The Doctor's Mistress
by Mischieffoal
Summary: A mysterious women keeps appearing to, and seducing, the Doctor's regenerations - but how does she do it? It's nearly impossible to enter the TARDIS without his permission, and as for seducing him...
1. Ninth

**Ninth**

The Doctor slammed the TARDIS door shut and fell back on it, breathing heavily. Damned Sontarens. He wiped his forehead and tucked what little hair he had behind his abnormally large ears. He wanted to shave it shorter, but just recently he hadn't had the time, what with usual invading aliens to scare off. A cheese and chutney sandwich appeared out of nowhere on the TARDIS's controls. He smiled and patted the ship companionably.

"Thanks, old girl." He whispered, his northern accent echoing around the control room. He quickly polished off his make-do dinner and set the TARDIS onto night shift.

He wandered slowly off towards his bedroom, through the library and narrowly avoiding the pool that just materialised out of nowhere in the middle of the books. The Doctor raised his eyebrows, but otherwise didn't comment on the change in décor. He pushed open his bedroom door and saw that somehow, the woman had found her way on board again. And not just any woman – The Woman.

oo0ooo0ooo0ooo0ooo0ooo0oo

He sighed and hung up his jacket on the hook an the back of the door.

"I think you'll find that that is my bed, Miss Adler, and I am very tired and would rather like to lie down in it."

Irene opened her eyes and rolled over to one side. "There's room for two."

The Doctor laugh. "Actually I don't want to share my bed tonight, especially with someone of your... calling?"

She pulled the duvet closer to her. "Oh, quit moaning, will you? I'm not moving, so you're just going to have to live with it. And sleep with it."

He opened his mouth to argue, but the extraordinary human just raised her eyebrows, and he shook his head and gave up. "Well, close your eyes then, I'm not stripping in front of you."

"I've seen you naked before, Doctor." She smirked. "I'm prepared."

He winced. "Not yet you haven't!"

She looked up at him almost apologetically, but she didn't quite pull it off. "Sorry, sweetie, you are younger than you were last time."

He put out his hands. "Stop, now. I really don't want to know what happens." He turned away from the Woman and pulled his top over his head, leaving him half undressed, and then climbed out of his trousers. Then he was standing in his boxers, which as it happened were 'TARDIS blue'. He turned back and avoided her eyes, but her eyes were aimed a bit lower than her face. He ignored that. "The duvet?" The duvet obligingly, impossibly, grew to a double. _Damn, now there was no excuse. _He lifted his side of the quilt and slipped in. He lay on his side and stared at the Gallifreyan covering the opposite wall, but however hard he tried, he couldn't ignore the warmth of Irene's body on his back. "Are you wearing any clothes?"

"No. I sleep naked. Problem?"

The timelord gritted his teeth. "No."

"But you sleep in your battle suit too, and you've still got your pants on."

He turned his head to face Irene, who was already looking his way with a glint of something he didn't like in her eyes. "Are you suggesting I take them off as well?" he asked sarcastically.

"Well I don't see why not."

The Doctor just looked at her for a few seconds, then got out of bed again and stripped off his last bit of protection. He turned around to climb back in and—

"Ooh, you big boy!"

He seemed to ignore that as he pulled the cover over him. But then he reached a hand out and slap Irene in the face, before turning away from her and lying on his side again.

She felt her sore cheek and grinned. "I don't think you realise what you just did." She threw the duvet off the bed and sat up, as the Doctor slowly turned his head apprehensively towards her. "You are completely unprotected in every way, and you just slapped a dominatrix who is also naked and in the same bed as you." She pulled his shoulder down until he was lying on his back. He tried to resist, but _bloody hell, she was strong. _"And you're still pretending you don't want me?" In a split second move, she was on top of him, with her legs straddling him and her breasts hanging in his face. He looked at them like a rabbit in headlights. She reached over his head for something and her boobs fell on either side of his nose.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

When her head came back into view, he held out her hand to stop her coming any nearer. Or he would have done, had his hands not been tied to the end of his bed. "Irene, we can't do this! If not anything else, I'm over nine hundred years old! Do you know what that means?!"

She smirked. "It's been a long time?"

"What? No!" He shook his head in desperation. "We're different species!"

"Oh, I know," Irene ran a finger down his torso, "But isn't it _nice_?" She suddenly grabbed his penis, which hardened at her touch.

The Doctor mumbled something untranslatable in his own language. Then he raised his eyebrows at her. "Promise you won't tell?"

Irene slid down her body until her mouth was directly above her hand. "Cross my heart and hope to die." and then her teeth bit in down hard on his erection.

He whimpered again, this time with considerably more pleasure.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

The dim light from the TARDIS's window played on their pale skin in the early hours of the morning. Irene Adler lay curled up on top of the Doctor, his chin resting on the crown of her head. The Woman stirred as the sun rose and impossibly filtered through the window that didn't look out on anywhere. She rolled off the timelord and smiled at his sleeping form, with his hands tied above his head. She slipped off the bed, put on his dressing gown and pressed down on the watch on her wrist. She faded away, leaving only her smile and eventually disappeared completely.


	2. Tenth

**Tenth**

The Doctor slammed the TARDIS door shut and fell back on it, breathing heavily. Damned Sontarens. He wiped his forehead and threw his jacket over one of the TARDIS's coral columns. A slice of cheese on toast appeared out of nowhere on the TARDIS's controls. He smiled and patted the ship companionably.

"Thanks, old girl." He whispered, his slight Scottish accent echoing around the control room. He quickly polished off his make-do dinner and set the TARDIS onto night shift. He wandered slowly off towards his bedroom, wondering as he did where his library had got to. He'd never even shown Donna... He ruffled his hair and yawned as he nearly fell into his room. When had he last slept? He didn't have a clue. He flung his jacket over the headboard and unbuttoned his shirt with fumbling fingers. It fell to the floor, soon accompanied by his trousers and pants. He turned blearily towards his bed, only realising when he lifted the duvet that someone was already occupying his space. Oh, for the love of Gallifrey!

"Again, Adler?"

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

"Again?!" She smirked. I've never seen _that_ before, sweetie!"

He nodded distractedly. "Of course you haven't." He made an involuntary move to reach for his glasses, but he wasn't wearing any clothes. "How do you do it?" He got into his bed and turned to Irene. "I mean, you're human, for God's sake!" He lay back on his pillow. "And yet you can travel in time..."

"Well, I know how I do that, but I am very interested to know how you are so comfortable in your..." her lips twitched upwards "battle suit, in your bed, with a woman of my profession..."

He felt her hand creep over his hip and he hit it away. "You stop that train of thinking right there, Irene."

"That was a bit of a half-hearted slap..."

He turned to growl (metaphorically, of course... _however, that's an idea..._) at her and her hand shot out again. He grabbed her fingers and glared at her, but didn't actually move her hand.

"Oh, you bad boy." With her other hand she traced his cheekbones, then his lips. He didn't react at all. She grinned. "I like a challenge."

"Glad to here it." Still no emotion.

Her eyes lit up and she threw the duvet on the floor. She climbed on top of him as he watched her with blank eyes. She _would _break him.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

She didn't tie him up, she never did when a client wasn't responding. Although, quite why she was giving this man her services for free was beyond her. He just held some kind of attraction for her. There were the obvious facts – his genius, his home, and the whole maybe-not-human part of it, but it was something more than that. Quite a few of her clients had had something not quite right about them, not normal in a _homo sapien. _It might have been the dreams... She dreamt of this man, with so many different faces and his amazing TARDIS.. which was just his house, but he just had a funny name for it. Anyway, she had to break him, no matter why.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

Irene took the Doctor's hands in hers and ran them down her sides, over her breasts and in the middle of her thighs. Oh, he was hard. But he was concentrating on something other than Irene, because it was only his resolve that was hard, not his penis, and as he was comfortable being completely naked with her... well, who knew what the future held? Or what his past held... She slapped him hard across the face.

"Thinking of others things is cheating."

He blinked and shook his head, but he'd lost it. She felt his boner in between her legs and she smiled.

He sighed and then pulled her towards him and gave himself up completely.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

The Woman lay beside the Doctor and traced the muscles on his chest with her finger as he slept. It was odd that he thought she could time travel, because she most definitely couldn't. He was the one that did the travelling, she just carried on through time as normal. She fingered the watch on his right wrist and raised her eyebrows as a computer display projected out of it in mid air. The circular design seemed familiar, and she read 'location' and 'date'. Well, that could come in very handy at some point. She found some clothes on the floor (somehow they were her size... and style), dressed, slipped on the watch, kissed the timelord softly on the forehead and left the room. "I'll be back."


	3. Eleventh

**Eleventh**

The Doctor slammed the TARDIS door shut and fell back on it, breathing heavily. Damned Sontarens. He flicked his over-long hair out of his eyes and loosened his bow tie. Some fish fingers and custard appeared out of nowhere on the TARDIS's controls. He smiled and patted the ship companionably.

"Thanks, old girl." He whispered, his childish voice playing with the acoustics. He quickly polished off his make-do dinner and set the TARDIS onto night shift. He'd have been able to get rid of those war hungry potatoes easily with River, but River had gone. Gone to the library and he would never see her again. The TARDIS grumbled at him and didn't turn her lights down. He raised his eyebrows at the control room. "What?" No answer. "You want to take me somewhere, do you?" The controls lit up in anticipation. "Oh, go on then." He placed his hand on the typewriter to let the TARDIS have her way, then leapt onto the battered old sofa and held on tight. She wasn't very used to driving herself.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

The Doctor reached inside his jacket and put his hand on his new sonic screwdriver, just in case. He eased open the door and slipped outside. The had landed in a Victorian drawing room somewhere on Earth, painted completely white with white furniture... 21st century then, just a Victorian house. He spun slowly on the spot, then again with his screwdriver out and whistling. It became almost unnoticeably more high-pitched as he passed it over the large mirror. He jumped over the the glass and the fireplace beneath it. He inspected all sides of the mirror, then under the mantelpiece.

"Aha!" The mirror slid up to reveal a locked safe. "Eight digits, easy enough..." He fiddled around with his screwdriver until it clicked. He ducked as he heard a different sort of click. A shot sang out from the safe and he placed his fingers on the mantle above his head and cautiously drew his head up to level with his hands. The rifle inside the safe was quiet, next to a familiar phone and a … oh Gallifrey. Well, that explained a lot.

The door opened and the Doctor spun around and pointed his screwdriver at the entrance. Irene Adler stood in the doorway. "Put the screwdriver down, Doctor."

He let it fall through his fingers as he collapsed on the sofa out of shock.

She was dressed, for once, as she walked towards the safe and pushed it closed. She loomed over him and undid his bow tie with a flourish. "But I would think about getting your other screwdriver out..."

He caught her hands as she reached for his shirt buttons. "Irene, do you know what is in that safe? Do you really know?"

She eased out of his grip and stood up straight again. "My life is in that safe, Doctor."

"Blimey, well, yes, exactly." He rubbed his temple worriedly.

But she hadn't finished. "That camera phone is my life. It contains the secrets of my survival."

He frowned. "What?! The _phone_?!"

"Well, what did you expect me to say?" She looked flummoxed, an unusual expression for her.

He pushed gently past her and unlocked the safe again, but found the right code that time and didn't have to duck. He took hold of a gold chain and brought out the ornamental instrument it was attached to. "Do you know what this is?"

Irene raised her eyebrows. "It's a family heirloom. And you're not having it. Why?"

The Doctor sighed, and let the heirloom hang from his fingers. "It's a person's life. The secret to their survival."

A gasp came from the door and a woman the Doctor had presumed to be dead strode over to him and took the gold fob watch from his open palm. She pocketed it. "Who the hell do you think you are?!"

"Kate!" Irene failed to get the woman's attention.

"So, you're Kate now, are you? Lucy Saxon?" That got a response.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

Kate/Lucy swung around to face Irene. "Who is he?" She hissed.

"It's me. The Doctor. I've changed, just like... Irene... but I remember it."

Lucy shut her eyes, all pretence of calm abandoned. "We'll talk about his later." She turned and stalked out of the room, her perfectly styled hair slowly falling apart.

Irene glared at the Doctor as her maid left. She pushed him onto the sofa and ripped off his top. She dug her majestic nails into his chest. "I don't want to wait for later. I want to know _**now.**_"

He tried to get out of her grip, and he could be a slippery fellow when he wanted to, but she had as much experience in holding on as he did slipping away.

"Tell me." She bit his shoulder and his childish faced dropped in shock.

"Ma—Adler!"

She slapped him across the face. She was nearly as good at it as River was. "Tell" another slap "me" and another "now!"

He apologised in his thoughts to his long gone wife, but there really was only one way to distract Irene now. He ripped apart her clothes with a timelord's strength and pulled her under him as he gripped her breasts. She herself a moment of pleasure and shut her eyes, which was when he struck. He blew regeneration energy on her closed eyelids and sent her to sleep.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

He passed a hand in front of her face and whispered in her ear. "When you wake up you will forget I was here. You will wake up at the sound of the TARDIS." He stood up and pulled his shirt on, reached over to take his bow tie from her... Then didn't. He leaned over and kissed her softly, on her mouth, on her neck, on her breasts... No! He couldn't do that to her, she was... Oh, like he gave a fuck. He kissed her hard on the mouth and then left the room before his hormones got the better of him again.


	4. Eighteent

**Eighteenth**

"Lucy?"

"In here." The voice came from a small room a small room, where the murderer of the ex-prime minister sat at a desk, watching Irene Adler through the CCTV footage on her laptop. Because that wasn't the ex-prime minister lying on the sofa, because he'd been an alien. Irene was definitely human. Lucy Saxon turned to the Doctor. "I didn't know you had it in you to leave her."

He slumped onto another chair. "I didn't know you had it in you to force her to become human again." He smiled weakly. "There I go, underestimating you again."

Lucy's mouth twitched upwards in reply. Then she was solemn again. Solemn and desperate. "I can't let the Master come back. She has to stay human, she has to stay as Irene Adler." Lucy/Kate looked up at her with venom in her eyes . "I don't care what you say about it, she stay human."

"Lucy, I—"

" She may not have the most honest of lives right now, but it's much better than what she was like as timelord."

The Doctor reached over and pushed the laptop lid down. "She is the only one of my kind left! I have been alone for hundreds of years!"

Lucy glared at him. "I didn't know you had it in you to be so selfish." Her lips twisted into a malicious smirk, almost mirroring that which she had worn nearly all her married life. "There I go, overestimating you again."

He leaned forward, his nose millimetres away from hers. "I will keep her safe, you cannot escape from the TARDIS if I don't want you to." She opened her mouth to argue, but he put a hand to her lips. "You don't need to remind me what she's done. I know. Nothing the Master has done could ever be forgotten. But I can guarantee, I give you my word, that if you give her back her memory I will ensure that there will be no more nightmares made by her._** I will keep **__her safe!_" He was nearly shouting.

Lucy Saxon pushed him away and opened her laptop again. Irene was sleeping on the couch on the screen. "Look at her. She's peaceful, happy with the life she's built for herself. She doesn't do any harm to people who don't harm other. She has a good life, to all intents and purposes, and you would _take it away from her?!_"

The Doctor's eyes boring into Lucy's head. "Look at her!"

"I _am_!" Lucy hissed.

"Look at her right hand." The Doctor turned his gaze to the screen. "Does a peaceful woman tap a rhythm like that in her sleep? A drumbeat?"

Lucy gulped, her eyes moist.

"She does that a lot, doesn't she? The tapping. Because of the sound in her head, the sound that never stops. The never ending drums!"

She blinked rapidly. "Every night. I couldn't sleep with it at first, but now it's as much a part of the nocturnal sound scape as the night buses." She dragged her eyes away from the screen and suddenly she was crying as she hadn't cried for years, since this new life had started. "_Every night!_" Her fingers tapped on the keyboard, perhaps unconsciously, perhaps not. Da-da-da-dum. Da-da-da-dum. Da-da-da-dum.

He pulled her into a hug that until than had been reserved for Ponds only. "I can help her, we can find a way to make it stop. I want to help her, I want to be her Doctor, I want... I want to be with her." He watched his most ancient enemy tapping away through the camera screen. "That's what I've wanted for both of us, ever since the Great Time War. The two of us would make such a team, the greatest team." He held her shoulders and stopped their embrace. "And you could come with us!"

She laughed. "No. I couldn't. A human and two timelords, would in my opinion, be an impossible threesome."

He grinned. "Is that an agreement?"

She shook out her hair and turned away from him. "Go. Just go."

He hesitated. His smile disappeared and he reached out a hand towards her, but she didn't see. He left the room silently. He opened the safe and the watches song – the Master's song – Irene Adler's song – filled his mind. Could he do it? Could he open the watch? Release the Master? Release the only other timelord in the universe? Destroy Irene Adler? Destroy The Woman? Perhaps destroy what, if anything, had gone between them? He waved a hand in front of her face. "You will wake up when the watch sings to you and you will be released of all hypnosis and will remember my visit today." He took a deep breath, and opened the watch. The Master's song filled the ears of all the universe, but almost all forgot it at once. Gold light flooded from the timepiece into Irene Adler's sleeping form.

Her eyes flew open, time energy glowing from her pupils. She laughed as the golden light receded into her body. "Well, that was a _lot_ more fun than professor Yana!"

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

The Master turned and waved to the camera in the corner. "Cooee, Lucy!" Her fingers reached to her temples as she felt her pulse. "Oh, two hearts! Da-da-da-dum!" She turned to the Doctor and grinned. "God, I've missed them." She pushed him up against the wall and he paled incredibly fast. "And the drumming." She breathed in sharply through her nose and kissed him with more power than she ever had before – the power of a timelord.

The Doctor sighed with relief and grabbed her naked shoulders and pushed her to the floor. _That _hadn't changed, then. He landed on top of her.

"You have me at a disadvantage, Doctor."

He frowned. "Oh, right, yes. Sorry." His clothes were almost immediately in a heap on the floor and he tumbled into the Master again.

Their bodies and minds interlocked in ways only timelords could, a mass of flesh rolling and loving in the middle of the Victorian sitting room. The shot of a revolver broke through their infinity from the little room next door. The lovers parted and lay on their backs, both more exhausted than if they'd just fought a battle fleet of daleks and the Doctor a hundred times more … was confused the word? Perhaps it was just shock. The Master smirked so widely that the whole fleet could have fitted inside that smile.

The Doctor frowned with non-existent eyebrows. "That was your wife, Master."

"Well," she kissed his hand, the nearest available part of him "now I've got my Doctor."

He pushed her away. "She's just killed herself!"

She raised her eyebrows. "Lucy Saxon, suicidal? I think not. The laptop probably took the brunt of the bullet."

Lucy called out from the corridor, confirming the Master's reasoning. "If you're getting her, I'm getting all the information. All those contacts, photos, snippets of conversations... All on my phone now, Doctor." Her heels clicked into the distance. "Just something to think about."

The Master fell on the Doctor this time, her insignificant (to her, at least) human partner instantly forgotten. Distant memories of for superior ways for bodies to communicate fled to the front of their minds as they kissed as no humans ever could.

oo0ooo0ooo0oo

Hours, maybe even days later, they finally parted. "I thought you had a wife?"

The Doctor flinched. "She died years before I married her."

"Ooh, nasty." A part of Harold Saxon leaked through in her voice, and suddenly she couldn't keep her eyes off the TARDIS any longer. She was drawn towards it like a magnet and she stopped in the doorway, soaking in the bigger-on-the-inside-ness of it. The Master strode into the control room, laughed at the typewriter and began pushing buttons and set to dematerialise. She was in her element.

The Doctor followed her movement with almost star-struck wonder as he pulled on his clothes again. "Where're we going?"

"Somewhere fun!" She pulled the Doctor into the TARDIS and stood in the doorway as her old home, her old life, vanished before her eyes. "I don't know why you've got dressed though."

He turned to face her, grinned and was a bit surprised when she shoved him against a wall and then hung him from a railing by his braces. "Err..."

"Sh." She pulled down his trousers and really went for it. He didn't stop her. He just leaned forward so he could kiss her again and again and again. The Doctor and his Master, the Master and her Doctor, together, in the TARDIS, as they always should have been. Though, the position _was _unexpected...

**The End**

**Well, that was interesting! This is probably going to be all I write for this pairing, but if anyone's interested in my carrying on this little fic, I might just well do that!**


End file.
